Debate vs Argue

I enjoy a good debate, a meeting of the minds with opposing viewpoints, driven by the desire to prevail. Passionately powerful yet informative and respectful. How about you, do you like debates? More often than not an argument is referred to as a debate, but they are not the same, do you know why?

According to an online dictionary: 

A debate is a formal discussion on a particular topic in a public meeting in which opposing arguments are put forward. And an argument is an exchange of diverging or opposing views, typically a heated or angry one. 

Sounds pretty much the same, doesn't it? particularly since the word argument is used in the definition of debate. And emphasis is placed on both having opposing viewpoints. But in my opinion, there are key elements that make them different. The first being emotion and the other being the takeaway.

Emotion is defined as a natural instinctive state of mind deriving from one's circumstances, mood or relationship with others. While takeaway is defined as a key point, or idea to be remembered, typically one emerging from a discussion or meeting. 

Though logically a debate and an argument are based in opposing viewpoints an argument is typically fueled by emotion not logic and as such lacks the formal courtesies that a debate must have to be effective. Also, the takeaway from an argument is likely to be clouded by emotional turmoil whereas the takeaway from a debate usually invokes reflection, thought and if really well done, growth. See the difference? 

Look at it this way, in an argument, emotion causes tempers to flare, and pretty soon one person takes the defensive while the other the offensive. But it solves nothing, points of views are not conveyed, and rationality is out the window. However, in a debate there is time allotted for opposing viewpoints as well as rebuttals, emotion may be present, but it is not the driving force. The driving force is the desire to present an irrefutable case based on logic and facts in order to win over and or quiet your opponent. A good debate should foster learning, thought and growth for both the debaters and the observers. 

Do you agree?

KEC

aka Deo Volente

12/27/2025

Love - by definition

Have you ever watched the Movie Fireproof? If not, here is the gist of it: 

It is a simple yet beautiful movie about a firefighter in a troubled marriage who through faith and the encouragement of others, finds the courage to repair what has been broken. 

It got me thinking about the definition of love, particularly as it pertains to marriage.

How would you define love?

One version of the bible (1 Corinthians 13: verses 4 - 7) defines it as follows:

Love is patient

Love is kind

It does not envy

It does not boast

It is not proud

It does not dishonor others

It is not self-seeking

It is not easily angered

It keeps no record of wrong

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth

It always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres.

The dictionary defines it as follows: 

An intense feeling of deep affection.

A great interest and pleasure in something

Are you leaning towards the bible or the dictionary definition? Why?

I am leaning toward the biblical definition, here's why.

It focuses on selfless rather than self, emphasizing the action, what we should and should not do in spite of what we feel. A how to of sorts, after all; intensity fades and interests change, but what we do has the potential to last a lifetime. The fact is, that applies to Love in any form, not just in a marriage.

KEC

aka Deo Volente

12/26/2025

Merry Christmas World!

 I hope you have a Christmas filled with love, laughter and moments you will cherish for a lifetime. 

KEC
aka Deo Volente

Destiny or delusion

Heart flutters.

Resolve melts like butter,

over an open flame.

Every time she hears his name.

Hands shake.

One glance is all it takes,

for her to freeze.

Two, will buckle her knees.

Thoughts race.

From the smile on his face, 

to his walk.

She forgets she knows how to talk.

One slight touch. 

Makes her blush, 

for he has the power to wake her.

His embrace will surely break her.

Eyes haze.

He's fixed in her gaze, 

she turns before the sway.

But he is the ripple in her day...

and destiny is barreling their way.

KEC

aka Deo Volente

12/23/2025

You're not alone.

Call him in the whisper of your heart's ache, 

he'll be awake.

Call him in the echoes of your smile, 

he'll walk that mile.

Call him in the shadow of your doubts, 

and let it out. 

Call him in the courage of your stand, 

he'll hold your hand,

Call him before your tears begin to dry, 

he won't ask why.

Call him when you're brimming with delight,

by day or night

Call him if you falter on your way,

even if the words are hard to say...

He'll share your every moment big and small,

all you have to do my friend, is call.

KEC

aka Deo Volente

12/22/2025

Images and sensory

Ripples on the rocks flowing, 
glowing.

Clouds dancing in the sky, 

windmills turning, green grass burning.

Words that echo in reply.

Petals like rain falling,

calling.

Shade beneath the oak tree,

trails of rust, caught in the winds gust.

Eyes mesmerized by what they see.

Towering isle of solid stone,

alone.

Horizon beyond the cave,

mountains wrapped, white snowcaps.

Beckoning the brave.

Blazing sun caught in a stream,

dream.

Rolling hills green and grey,

waterfalls of white, glisten in the light.

Takes my breath away.

KEC

aka Deo Volente

12/21/2025

In our attic

My current state of mind must be on a Disney trip and by trip I don't mean vacation. 

It started with Goofy and morphed into Donald Duck. 

As a child, were you a fan of Saturday morning cartoons?

If you were, like I was, you may recall Duck Presents. 

If you are not familiar, let me paint the picture. 

Donald Duck was caught in an endless battle with chipmunks, Chip and Dale. 

They would antagonize one another relentlessly over the most trivial things, 

and more often than not it was hilarious.

Now that I am older and in the midst of a similar battle, I can honestly say,

I have no idea how Donald managed to maintain his sanity.

Though my battle entails squirrels and not chipmunks, it is just as frustrating. 

These little nuisances have burrowed their way into our attic and apparently, 

have put out the welcome mat.

Our efforts to win this battle have been futile.

We sealed the hole, so they made another.

We placed a trap, but they manage to evade it.

We have tried to scare them out but evidently, 

we are not as intimidating as we think we are.

They are masters of hiding so no matter how hard we try we cannot catch them.

The most frustrating thing is, every so often, we hear them up there, 

digging and moving, I gather they're renovating.

Honestly, if this wasn't so frustrating, it would be comical.

Now I understand how Donald felt and I can assure you...

this means war!!!

KEC

aka Deo Volente

12/20/2025

The season and the reason

The air had a chill about it today and though I am not a fan of the cold, it was beautiful. 

The wind seemed to toss about a sense of peace. 

The clouds were vibrant yet still and the sky was entrancing. 

I wanted to lie in the grass and look up, 

would that have been strange for a grown up to do? 

Don't answer that. 

I think we are as old as we feel and though there are many days when I am undoubtedly my age, 

there are days, like today, when I am but a child at heart. 

It got me thinking about baby Jesus in that manger...on a still silent night. 

A priceless gift to the world, in the package of a baby. 

Nine little fingers with two opposing thumbs and ten toes, 

probably wrinkled, maybe fussy...

but beautiful just the same. 

I hope I never forget the reason for this season, 

and if by chance I begin to, 

God will still the clouds, like today, so I am reminded to look up. 

 

KEC

aka Deo Volente

12/19/2025

Healing

I lost myself in words of then,
never to be seen again.
Until the pages read,
the truth of things once said.
 
I found myself in rhythmic prose,
a she that only whisper knows.
Falling like the sand,
caught within my hand.
 
I saw my soul in lines of pain,
in downpour of forgotten rain.
Lost to time and sound,
fleeting yet profound.
 
I told myself with every tear,
in distance of each long-lost year.
Tomorrow is today,
so live it just that way.

I thrust myself toward the sun,
and to the moon as night begun.
To reach that distant sky,
in whispers of my why.
 
I gazed upon the birds in flight,
and kissed the clouds with pure delight.
Rejoicing in the wind,
my heart began to sing.
 
I woke up to a dance of me,
for all the world to truly see.
That broken hearts can heal,
and God knows how I feel.
 
KEC
aka Deo Volente
12/13/2025

Advice from an average Mom.

When our children were young, I tackled parenting on a wing and a prayer. I showered them with love even when I didn't like them, disciplined them when I needed to and insisted on a few things: 

• Put God first.
• Know that you are loved.
• Read
• Think
• Believe in yourself.
• Love yourself and your siblings.
• Remember, right is right and wrong is wrong, there are no grey areas.
• You are only as good as your word.
• Just because it comes to mind, doesn't mean it needs to come to mouth.
• There are too many words in the English language to limit yourself to just a few.
• Seek advice from your parents not your peers, we have more experience and will always have your best interest at heart.
• Everyone makes mistakes, it's what you do after, that makes the difference.
• Be respectful to others even if they don't deserve it.
• Treat others the way you wish to be treated.
• Stand unwaveringly for what you believe in but be willing to hear the perspective of others.
• Verify every argument with at least 3 reputable sources.
• Laugh often, cry if you need to and know that we, your family, are always here for you.
• No matter what you do, do your best.
• Trust yourself, but when in doubt, call Dad.
• Remember your life is yours to live so live it in such a way that you can be proud of the person you see in the mirror. 

Now these individuals, our children, are adults, and though I know we raised them to the best of our abilities, if you buy into the argument of Nature vs Nurture it could go either way. The fact is, they are who they are and all we can do as parents is love them and cheer them on for as long as they need us to. Hopefully, that makes all the difference.

KEC
aka DV
12/11/2025

Forgotten

She lived this life a thousand times 

in heart, in dreams, in whispered rhymes

and still it turned the same

she had herself to blame.

She chose to love beyond the hate

to rise above that faultless state

a child can't time their birth

parents dictate their worth.

But as she heard the silence scream 

in shatters of each heartfelt dream

the shards had cut too deep

all she could do was weep

Weep for the girl who had no chance

who stepped into the rain to dance

and let her anguish flow

pretending not to know. 

Pretending not to feel the sting

of words and deeds that ripped through skin

where hope would learn to die

behind each well-kept lie.

She carried it without desire, 

that sword forged in her hellish fire

where childhood should have shone

she bore her pain alone.

But blow by blow she lost the fight

and on her knees one weary night

she crumbled by the road

15 years her load.

Her scream was meant to still her heart 

that thing that they had tourn apart

she lost her will to breathe

unwanted like the weed.

Yes, she lived that life a thousand times 

in heart, in dreams, in whispered rhymes

and still it turned the same...

you'd think they'd feel some shame,

no-one recalled her name.

KEC

aka DV

12/9/2025

___________________________________________________________________

Honestly, I prefer this ending...

Yes, she lived that life a thousand times 

in heart, in dreams, in whispered rhymes

and still it turned the same...

you'd think they'd feel some shame,

but God knows all their names.

So why didn't I use it you ask, because it was not my original thought and though I often change and revise my poems I felt it was important to leave this one as is. It's okay to laugh about pain sometimes but sometimes laughter just isn't the best medicine. 

Be well world and please, be good to each other.

KEC

aka DV

12/9/2025

A Goofy day

Do you like cartoons? If you said yes, who is your favorite character and why? 

Personally, I am a diehard Goofy fan, yes, you read that right...Goofy. He is my absolute favorite cartoon character. He is determined, kind and a complete mess! That's why I watched A Goofy Movie so many years ago, but it was the movie's message that made me watch it again with my children when I became a mother. 

For no special reason I played the theme song today and as I sang along, I was reminded of the reason I love this movie. Every line in this song is powerful, but this line, always gets me...

 "If we listen to each other's heart, we'll find we're never too far apart. And maybe love is the reason why, for the first time ever we're seeing it eye to eye"

Imagine how beautiful this world would be if we chose to listen to each other's hearts. Maybe Goofy isn't so goofy after all.

KEC
aka Deo Volente

12/3/25

Just one thing

If you could do just one thing, no-holds-barred, what would you do?

Sounds like a trick question, doesn't it? 

The thing is, just one thing can change so many things. 

One variable can change the outcome...

One drop in a bucket can cause it to overflow.

One spark can start a fire.

One lapse in judgement can change a life.

One word can change a sentiment.

One ingredient can change a recipe.

One smile can change a heart.

One leap of faith can change everything.

Makes me wonder why we diminish the power of one.

So, with that in mind, I'll ask that question again. 

If you could do just one thing, no-holds-barred, what would you do? 

If you said go skydiving, that's okay, after all isn't that a leap of faith :)

KEC

aka Deo Volente

11.26.2025

We are

We are bound by more than our years, 

tethered by laughter and tears.

Woven in and out of sand, 

where we stumble and where we stand.

We are more than the words that are spoken, 

where hearts beat and passions awoken. 

Where dreams and nightmares collide, 

wishes cast on stars far and wide.

We are more than the silence of the morn, 

where truth meets the light where it's born.

The ripples of time and space, 

where nothing and no one can erase.

We are more than the whisper of the wind, 

where we play, where we dance, where we sing.

Like waves that seek in earnest the shore...

we are all these things and more.

KEC

aka Deo Volente

10.18.2025

Tis the season - to pray

Soon the trees adorned in lights, 

carolers and snowball fights. 
Santa Claus, if you believe...

that special gift you might receive.

Recipes and mounding plates, 

the guest each year who's always late.

Bows atop those gifts aplenty, 

but what about those who don't have any?

No trees or lights to leave a spark

within the stillness of the dark

No roof for Nick to land his sleigh

as he goes on his merry way. 

No food to prep, no one to see

no one to call, no place to be.

No gifts to give and none to receive...

so tell me, why would they believe?

So in this season, this I pray

for every heart that aches today.

God lift their load and shine your light

beyond the darkness of their sight.

Please fill them till they overflow

with blessings only they will know.

Then love them Lord the way you do...

this O Lord, I ask of you.

K.E.C

aka Deo Volente

11.23.2025

Dreamer

 Have I told you that I am a dreamer? 

I have always had my eyes firmly fixed on the vastness of the sky and the wonders of the Earth. I am mesmerized by the beauty of God's creation and am tickled pink that I am but a speck within it. It drives me to wonder, propels me to hope, and pushes me to embrace every bit of myself.

It is as though the sand, the stars and everything in-between have held my every dream and fleeting wish since the day my eyes opened. Still, I am painfully aware that life does not embrace the dreamer. 

Could it be because the dreamer tries to see beyond the stagnant air of now, or because they dare to reach for what seems unreachable. Is it because they will not conform or because they appear to the non-dreamer as a person lost in the haze of their own thoughts? 

Or maybe those who have chosen to let go of their dreams wish to steer them clear of what they believe might be heartbreaking or are they, the non-dreamer, fearful that where they have failed this new dreamer might succeed? 

I honestly have no idea why the world and those in it can be so grey when in fact we are surrounded by color. 

I will tell you this though. 

If you are a dreamer, never stop dreaming! Your dreams have the power to still the waters that rage and bring clarity in the midst of the storm. It is your center of gravity so embrace it, fuel it with the fire of possibility and optimism. And know that if by chance that dream of yours does not come to fruition, you are more beautiful for having tried to make it a reality...it is after all, what makes you unique.

KEC

AKA Deo Volente

10.12.2023

What are you waiting for?

 Have you ever been afraid to move forward? Strange question right? 

The thing is, movement is natural, as babies we lift our arms and legs, roll over and rock. From rocking we gage the balance we need to crawl and from crawling we find our center of gravity and stand. Once we stand, we begin to formulate our plan to step and eventually we do. Once our plan is implemented, each step plays an essential part in our effort to move forward. One could argue that we can walk backwards and indeed with practice, we can. However, I would argue that our bodies are designed for forward motion even if we choose not to. 

Look at your feet, the position of your eyes. We as human beings were crafted for forward movement and at the end of the day, direction is relative, movement is not. 

Even if we choose to swim in backward strokes or walk backwards, we are always moving forward because time moves forward. Being stationary does not change that fact either, time is the determining factor and no matter what we do or don't do, it continues to move.

which begs the question, what are you waiting for? 

What stops you from moving with it? 

Is it a person, place or thing?

Will they or it change if you stand still?

How much time are you willing to use and are you sure you have the time to lose?

Remember, even if we are still, time is not. 

So carpe diem as they say and make the most of your day.

KEC

AKA Deo Volente

5/24/2025

I ought to walk out in the rain

 I ought to walk out in the rain is the title of my most recent book of poetry. I have learned (learnt) a lot since the publication of my first book with the most important lesson being. Writers read what they have written not what they wrote. Still, I did it and I am proud of myself for it, not only for publishing but for having the courage to say out loud the things I needed to. I hope whoever reads it will realize that they are not alone, no matter where they are or what they are going through.

KEC
aka Deo Volente
2/9/2025

Gone but not forgotten

 I should begin by saying Happy New Year, it is my deepest wish that it finds you full of hope, surrounded by love and overflowing with blessings. 

Once again, we venture into the arms of a New Year. Uncertain of what the days, weeks or months may bring but willing to put one foot in front of the other. The reasons may vary from person to person but for me it is simple. I do it for those held in my heart, in and out of my time. You may be wondering what I mean by that so let me explain. I believe our loved ones live eternally in our hearts even when their time runs out. And if we are truly blessed, we will live eternally in someone's heart when our time runs out. With that said, there are a few I carry whole heartedly with me who no longer exist within the ticking of my time and a few who, thankfully, still do. After God, they are what matters most to me. For the ones gone, their faces have begun to fade from my memory, but my heart can still see them clearly. For the ones here, every moment counts. I give to them every bit of myself through my laughter, my tears, my courage and my fears. When I stand and when I fall, I carry them with me through it all. They are and shall forever be my greatest blessings; I pray that I am theirs as well.

Do you hold someone in your heart?

I hope you do but more than that, I hope someone holds you in theirs.

KEC

AKA Deo Volente

1/25/2025